Neji's Pimp Life
by princezzme
Summary: Neji is a pimp. He has fangirls and he hustles food pills.Major OOCness.Major Ghettoness.NejiTen SasuIno SasuSaku if you'll call it that even.
1. Chapter 1

Hey this is princezzme! just lettin u know once again how bored i get.A little note that will help this story b better:Imagine the ghetto girls talking with new york accents if u cn't imagin it any othr way...and I also dn't know GOODBYE!

I don't own a cd player,cheesecake or a michael jackson cd do u think i own naruto?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Neji puts on his shades and his saggy pants and got ready for another day of school,letting people do allll the work for him.Ahhhh life is sweet,Neji thought as he did his pimp walk down the street to his school Da High Skool of Konoha. On his way he saw Ten-Ten wearing green bootie shorts and and a tight sleevless shirt. "Neji"Ten-ten said looking into a compact and putting on lipgloss. "What woman?" Neji answered abruptly. "How come you ain't call me back last night? I was waitin by da phone and you aint neva call."Ten-Ten said. "I had some buisiness to take care of." Neji said. "What knid of buisiness?" Ten-Ten asked. "Dat ain't important all like dat just chill shawty. Lets walk." Neji answered. Neji continued doing his pimp walk down the street while Ten-Ten switched her but back and forth.

At school

Neji was on his way to his locker when two fangirls/valley girls appeared.

The fangirls scream."Omg we like so totally love you cuz you're like so awesome! Your soooo hot and pimptastic!" They said excitedly. "Eh ya'll needs to chill dis ain't cool." Neji said and continued pimp walking to his next class. On his way to class he sees Sasuke walking with Sakura and Ino on his arms. "Eh yo Sasuke! We needs to have a convo-sation." Neji said pimp walking over to Sasuke. "What you want?" Sasuke asked. "You owe me some food pills and some money." Neji says snapping his fingers then Ten-Ten and Haku appear at his arms. "I'mma give you dat tommorrow." Sasuke said. "Naw you gone give me my food pills today." Neji replied. Neji grabs Sasuke by his shirt and pushes him up against the locker. "All right right man I'll give you your money now I promise please don't kill me! I have too many fangirls and my hair is too spiky for me to die now!!" Sasuke says with his voce wavering. "Dats what I'm talkin bout."Neji said.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Will Neji get his money and food pills?

Will Neji discover that Haku is on his arm?

Find out in the next chapter of...Neji's pimp life!!!!!!!

PLz leave a comment and be nice!!!And remember ALWAYS give Neji his money and food pills or else!


	2. Chapter 2

Yo Yo Yo! Srry couldn't resisit. I'm wearing pajamas! and now to our story

"Dats what I'm talkin bout." Neji said to a near tears Sasuke. Sasuke handed Neji his money and food pills and then ran while Sakura and Ino stood there looking seductive. "Haku! Where did you come from? And why da hell are you wearin a micro-mini?" Neji asked. "I just want to be useful by making you look good." Haku said. "Man get da hell outta here!" Neji yelled. Haku walked seductively away. "Neji when you gone take me on a date? Cuz I'm a classy lady and I feel unappreciated!" TenTen said sucking her teeth. "Wheneva I feel like it." Neji said and continued pimp walking to class leaving the girls there to dance in slow motion and look seductive. Ahhh just like in the videos.

"Neji why are you late?" said his science teacher Guy. "Ain't none a yo biusiness why I was late." Neji said making Lee get out of his chair so he could sit even though there were plenty of other seats. "Turtwig! I choose you!" said Ash bursting through the door. "Eh Yo Ash get out dis is my story." Neji said lowering his sunglasses "But I hafta--" Neji cut him off "It's yo destiny to get out my story 'fore I stuff you in one a dem Pokeballs." Ash sighed "okayyyyyy. Ash is sad." He said walking away.

"Neji I need to talk to you for a quick second." TenTen called to Neji at his locker. "What woman." Neji said. TenTen slapped him across the face,hard. "You was cheatin on me with dat little skank Sasame and now she pregnant!" TenTen yelled. "Ain't mine." Neji said calmly. "Yeah it is yours! I saw her numba in yo phone! You a liar! I'mma get my cousin and my grandma and my momma and my brotha and my godsista's little cousin's step uncle..." Neji was completely tuning her out thinking that he should get get some french fries. "And i'mma get all them people to fight you!" Then Ten-Ten walked away.

Will Neji remember that he doesn't know Sasame?

Will TenTen gather up those people to fight Neji?

Will Neji get some french fries?

Find out in the next chapter of (Heroic music) Neji's Pimp Life!

well um... review


	3. There's a chappie and important info

hello people! how r ya? srry it took so long i got mAjOr writers block. Yes my spelling errors are intended. and shame on all the peple who didn't review!! so thanx 2:rottenkunoichi, Kamiko Hiami, Shikamaru's babygirl,MidoriGreenTea, Ghetto Anime Princess, sexyinumama and Bucket On The Head for reviewing (so neh!) and (neh)

this a separation line

--999999999999999999999978595555555555555555555599--

When school was over, Neji pimp walked to Mickey D's(McDonalds) and got a free water cup. "Ey yo cashier lady." Neji said. "Yes." she answered. "You look fine today." He said. "Thanks!" She replied blushing.

Then Neji filled the water cup with Coca Cola.

Neji was pimp walking over to Gaara's house to steal his car when Gaara appeared in front of him. "Them is some sharp sunglasses." Gaara said. "Oh Please, I stole deez." Neji said. "I ain't got no sunglasses." Gaara said nonchalantly. "Get you some." Neji said. "I really like dem sunglasses man." At that note Gaara snatched Neji's sunglasses and ran. But he tripped and fell over his pants which were around his ankles. Then he got up and hopped on a magic carpet. So Neji called Choji. "Hello?"

"Ey what's up Choji?"

"Ey me and deese 5 girls is finna get busy know what I mean?

"Who?"

"Sakura, Ino, Sasame, Temari and one of Sasuke's long lost cousins. I forgot her name."

"Dat's hot man! But next time you see Gaara jack him fo' me. Aight?"

"Can do. See you later man."

"Peace."

Neji hung up the phone and continued pimpwalking down the street. "I don't even know nobody named Sasame." Neji remembered.

All of a sudden a little girl with her hair half braided, a boy that looked like TenTen, an old lady with a sword for a cane, a lady that looked like TenTen and some business man walked up to Neji and glared at him like they were ready to fight. "Scuse me." Neji said trying to get past them. The little girl pushed him and he fell on the ground. Stronger than she looks. "I heard you was cheatin in my cousin TenTen." The little girl said. "What da hell is you talkin bout?" Neji asked confusedly. The old lady whacked upside the head with her purse. "Don't you mess wit my grandbaby!" she said. "What is yall talkin bout?" Neji asked again. "You know damn well what she talkin bout!" said the lady who looked like TenTen. "No I don't man!" Neji said. The lady narrowed her eyes at Neji. "Don't play wit me lil boy cuz i will go get da switch off da tree."

The boy put his thumb in Neji's face. Then glared at him. Eerily. "Don't mess wit my sister."

Then the business man spoke up. "If you ever mess with my neice's sister's little cousin's...how am I related to her again?" The others shrugged thier shoulders. "Any ways, don't mess with...her emotion or I'll destroy your credit faster than you can beat Bratz Rock Angelz." He said. "Whatever man." Neji replied.

5 seconds later

Neji limped home with a bloddy nose, mouth and pinky toe, abroken thumb, arm and cell phone and damaged dignity. He walked in to see TenTen sitting seductively on his couch. "Neji boo? What hapened to you?" She asked with fake sympathy and innocence but an evil smile on her face. Then Inuyasha walked eating salami. "Hey." he said nonchalantly. "Hey?" TenTen and Neji said. "Have you seen Kagome?" Inuyasha asked. "No." TenTen said. "Ok." He said walking out of the door. "You sent all dem people to jump me!" Neji yelled. Kagome burst through the window. "Have you seen Inuyasha?"

"No" Neji said. Kagome left.

"That'll teach you to cheat on me." TenTen said.

Kagome walked in "Inuyasha!"

Inuyasha ran to her in slow motion. Kagome ran to him in slow motion. Happy music played in the background. Kagome kissed Inuyasha passionately. Then they began to take each other's clothes off. "HEY!" TenTen screamed. "Wea re tryin to have a dramatic moment!"

Kagome and Inuyasha stopped and nodded. Then Kagome went "Gasp!" And Inuyasha went "Gasp" And TenTen went "Gasp" And Neji went "Te he he cheesepuffs."

Will TenTen have a dramatic moment with Neji?

Will Kagome find out she forgot the pill?

Will I go to camp on June 22nd '08 for 14 days? (yes)


	4. Chapter 4

Hey ya'll! I never thought this tory would last this long! Thanks for staying with me even though I'm a wretched procrastinator. lol

R&R please!

* * *

Kagome and Inuyasha stopped and nodded. Then Kagome went "Gasp!" And Inuyasha went "Gasp" And TenTen went "Gasp" And Neji went "Te he he cheesepuffs."

"What is wrong wit you?" TenTen said.

"What you talkin' 'bout woman?" Neji replied stealing Inuyasha's clothes and pushing him out of the window.

"I always be bein' nice to you and whatever but you don't never love me like you 'spose to." TenTen said sounding hurt.

Suddenly, Kagome screamed in agony. "I forgot the pill !!!!!!!!!!!!!!" She screamed looking up at the ceiling.  
"Anyway, I don't know what you talkin' bout trick. You know don't nobody love you but me! Now lemme borrow yo car." Neji said. TenTen handed him the keys and started to cry.

"Ay! I ain't wit all dat cryin stuff man! Dat ain't cool! Now I got a real good bootleg of Good Hair so why don't you just chill and watch dat fo' me, aight?" Neji said.

"Oooh! One a-dem real good ones wit da clear pitchers (pictures) and it where ain't no people in da theatre gettin' up?" TenTen replied suddenly tear-free.

"Fa sho!"

Ah, the joys of young love. Neji pimp walked injuredly to TenTen's car and got in. He turned on the radio and blasted Bedrock as loud as he could. Then he opened all the doors to the cars and drove slowly down the street. Suddenly, Sailor Moon ran across the street and stood in the middle of the road. The sailor moon theme began to play louder than Bedrock.

"Ay trick get out mah way!" Neji yelled out of the car.

"Neji? Is that you?" She asked.

"Saila Moon? Saila Moon girl!" Tsunade yelled from the sidewalk in her church apparel.

"Tsunade?" Sailor Moon replied.

"Oh girl! What you doin' round here? Girl I ain't seen you in years! You ain't been to da church! Wassaup wit dat?" Tsunade said standing next to her in the street.

"Well I got canceled so...."

"I'm sorry to hear dat. But you know, Gawd will help us through, girlfriend. Just like he always does." Tsunade said closing her eyes and nodding.

"Saila Moon! I ain't seen you in a minute! How you been?" Neji said getting out and wishing the Sailor moon music would stop.

Meanwhile, 5 cars were at either end of the street trying to get by.

"I've been pretty good. You know just trying to make a living in these hard times!" Sailor Moon replied.

"HEY! Get out the street!" Kakashi yelled from his car. Neji shot him in slow motion.

"Ooh! Neji! I dun heard things about you! Both-a-ya'll need to come to tha chuhch(church)!" Tsunade said grabbing both of them and dragging them to the "chuhch".

What will happen at the church?

Will Neji remember that he left the car in the middle of the street?

Will Tsunade remember that she left her church wig at home?

Find out on the next chapter of Neji's Pimp Life!


End file.
